Bipolar Parenting During the Pandemic

Bipolar Parenting During the Pandemic

Parenting is tough – being a bipolar parent is even tougher. I have noticed during the pandemic that I have been more irritable; everyday seems to be a struggle. When my baby spills food, I get frustrated because its just one other thing I have to clean (it seems like all I do is clean nowadays). Anytime I am needed for something, I have to get up.  Simply getting up has been a struggle; my feet are always hurting and I am always tired. Every day I somehow muster up the energy to play with my child and talk to her, and engage with her. Everyday we go for a walk. Everyday we sing songs. Overall, she is doing so well. She is still in the 90th percentile for her height and weight, and she is going to start walking very soon. But inside, I am a disaster.

I think I am going to have to start working soon. My family is starting to notice that I am depressed. I called a therapist at my doctor’s clinic to see if I can get some help. I have applied to multiple places for work, and I am awaiting responses.

Some people might think I shouldn’t work before my baby’s first birthday. But I think it is more important that she has a happy and healthy caregiver. And being around her, while awesome, makes me miss having an adult around. Besides, those in tougher countries like in Africa, they strap those babies on their backs and work a hard day’s labour until night, every day and every night, until the baby is one years old. The babies seem to do alright, though – although they are behind, they catch up really fast in their first year. So even if there are quite high standards in North America, it’s good to remember that sometimes it doesn’t have to be that complicated. I need to do what I need to do to function. And I believe my baby will be grateful for that in the long run.